I don’t know if this is the case for everyone, but for me working from home has created a new layer of guilt.
I posted this picture on Instagram yesterday. I was working from home on my living room sofa doing work in an online course with my puppy snuggled next to me, and I was overwhelmed with the sense that I should be doing more.
As a small business owner, the norm is to feel as though we are always hustling. There is always something we can be doing to grow our business. The goal is grow bigger and make more money, right?
When I left my accounting job last year it wasn’t because I didn’t enjoy the work, or because I didn’t love my clients & my co-workers. I pursued my own businesses full-time in order to create a more flexible schedule that would allow me to spend as much time as possible with any children that God blesses us with. One of the many things I learned carrying James was that any time we have with our children is a precious gift. Jason and I found ourselves in a place where we could make it happen, so I went for it.
Living on a tight budget isn’t glamourous. There are lots of days where I find myself thinking “I could do XYZ and that would be really profitable.” Of course XYZ requires time away from home. While that isn’t a problem right now, it isn’t the ultimate goal either.
Since we brought Lula home there have been many times when I have asked myself why I thought I had time for a puppy. I’m forced to shorten my days away from home. When I am home, inventory creation can only happen in managed chunks of time. When I’m working online I have to be efficient and take breaks to play tug with my energetic puppy.
It’s almost like having a toddler...
When I took that picture I realized that while having this sweet puppy is definitely slowing me down, she is also preparing me for the day when I am juggling my work with the children that I am desperately praying for. I don’t believe in coincidence. Does this mean God is preparing me because I’m going to get my miracle baby soon? I don’t know. I sure hope so.
In the meantime, I’m going to spend some time on my sofa with a sleeping pup on my lap and learn not to let myself feel guilty that I may be “leaving money on the table”, because money isn’t everything. I’m playing the long game here & that doesn’t involved hustling until I drop. Winning for me will be days at home with little ones. The schedule I am cultivating now is going to make that possible one day.
What is making you feel guilty right now? Do you need to let go of what other people think you “should” be doing? Or maybe you need to remind yourself of the long game. What are you working towards & why is what you are doing the right choice, even when it presses against typical expectations?